So I'm all set up and sitting in my new office....previously known as the guest room. The prior owners painted this room a lovely (read: mind-numblingly bright) shade of yellow and painted the ceiling to resemble the sky - clouds and all. So really it's like I'm working outdoors - or in a nursery which is probably a lot more accurate. Oh, how the might have fallen - I've gone from a lovely 14th floor window office to a room where I share with the cat's litter box.
I've been sitting at my desk since 8:30 this morning in my suit, heels and hose....okay, my jeans, boots and shirt I slept in....but the phone hasn't rung once. Instead I've been listening to the sound of my coworkers going busily about their business....okay, listening to the dog fart in her sleep (Stella says: "Up yours, bitch! You try eating kibble all the live long day and not farting in your sleep.").
The good news is that I have managed to avoid purchasing anything over the internet for a whole 16 minutes so far and I've only looked at porn once this morning.....okay, twice. Wasn't really interested in surfing porn at 9 in the morning but did it just so I can say I perused some porn "at work".
Right about now in my old life, I would be walking on down and seeing how Anal Coworker was doing but perhaps I'll go have to see how the ladies on The View are doing instead (totally kidding, those chicks annoy the crap out of me and just barely beat out Regis and Kelly for people I most want to shoot).
I suppose if this thing is going to work out I'm going to have to go get some clients. Which of course means I'm going to have to leave the house and be nice to people.
Anyone know where the closest offshore oil rig is?