Sunday, May 15, 2005

Another Weekend Shot to Hell

Well I survived and thus far the Princess of Darkness (lovingly known as "POD") is still breathing and representing for the dark side. Inconsiderate Moron and pal left this morning for their 12 hour treck back to the great white north (though for some reason it apparently takes this woman 15 hours - hello....pedal on the right is the gas I suggest you use it if you plan to make Chicago before the 4th of July).

Inconsiderate Moron was actually quite nice - very laid back and easy to talk to. But no matter how you slice it - it all just ends up being about 36 hours of small talk. I hate small talk. I'm good at it but that doesn't mean I want to do it all the time (kinda like blowjobs but that's probably more of a topic for Lola).

Anyhoooo, POD had a nice time with her pal up until last night when her pal handed over POD's pack of Newports in the interest of perserving POD's health. Last time I caught POD with cigarettes they were unfiltered Camels - she likes her raw smoke that POD of mine. I of course was properly stern and foreboding but all that kept going through my head was "Fucking Newports??? What the hell is she - a Guatemalan hooker? A crack whore from Tijauna? An 84 year-old truck driver named Clyde? NEWPORTS? Christ, can't she smoke Marlboro Lights like normal people?".

This is why I should probably go ahead and have the tubes tied. Should not be trusted with the youth of America. Youth of Guatemala - fine - but NOT youth of America.

4 comments:

The Macek Collective said...

No. The world needs more Floyds and Lolas. If'n anybody wants some of this TMC seed, I'll send you some fresh.

Lola said...

#1 I do like blowjobs but that doesn't mean I want to sit around givin' em 24/7.

#2 I don't know how you feel about this Floyd but I think the spawn of Lola and TMC would absolutely give POD a run for her money. I'm with you, it's better to go ahead and sterilize myself right now.

Bottle Rocket Fire Alarm said...

At least she isn't a person who checks out books about serial killers and smokes cloves.

It's the clove smokers that scare me.

Every single one of them smoke them "because they smell good." These people are always interested in forensics and crime scenes and international travel.

Did I miss something? Weird fuckers.

Jen in Door County said...

Your thing on smoking had me howling. Back in the day, in my yoot, when I much more judgmental than am I now, like that could be possible....no one smoked menthols unless they were black or a junkie. NO ONE.
Then I moved to FL and all sorts of non-black and non-junkie types were smoking menthols. Shot my whole cig distinction thing all to hell. Also made me look at a lot of them out of the side of my head.